An Irish woman’s social, political and domestic commentary
I am off to Palo Alto again. I am very annoyed about lots of things and then don’t post about them because I think, “Sarah its not healthy to cultivate your annoyance.”
Kinda funny how the men are all jippy with me at the moment. Some people often observe, and not very nicely, that I’m always around men.
Oh well! I shall try not to argue with you while I am away and work on my Metta Bhavana instead..
does a car need to be going to inflict this kind of damage?
“A MAN in his early 20s died and a child was left critically injured after a car left the road and hit a house in Co Tipperary on Saturday night.
A further five people were injured in the crash shortly before 10pm near Rosegreen on the Cashel to Clonmel road.
Gardaà said the man who died was driving one of two cars involved in an incident that led to a car hitting a house at about 9.50pm, injuring a seven-year-old boy and two women – one in her 50s and the other in her 80s. The force caused severe structural damage to the house, where a family gathering had taken place earlier on Saturday.
Three people in a second car – a man, his son and another boy – were also taken to South Tipperary General Hospital in Clonmel.
Eddie Bennett, a councillor in Cashel who knew the deceased, said…….
“I went out to the accident, and when I saw the car and the engine was about 30 feet away from it, I just couldn’t face it.”
A funny and revealing incident yesterday.
I invited some friends down for lunch which is a rare event. I usually make the expedition to town, where as is the custom, we greet each other with cheek kissing (lips making contact with skin when warranted – air-style reserved for less-intimate acquaintances) and varying degrees of hugs (I prefer the two hands on shoulders minimalist version to the full-on arms around the neck drama).
Yet when my friend John was leaving yesterday he laughed heartily when I offered him my hand to shake. “What are you doing shaking hands with me?” I realised it was because we were in Enfield – where we shake hands and do not kiss, or hug, ever, regardless of who the meeter or greeter is – be they friend or relation.
Same person but different location! Automatically I reverted to type when in my own kitchen, but in Dublin 2 where we would normally meet in executive restaurants, it would never have occurred to me to shake hands. In fact, it would be odd and bizarre…
Our unconscious little ways….
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Note: ST column which features some observations from last week. But one update.
This morning I visited the Third Age group in Summerhill. Many issues there for further discussion but one which came up – the volunteers are mainly women. They have great trouble trying to get men involved even when they identify male pensioners who NEED to be involved – purely for socialisation. They know men who have been widowed and gradually become isolated. It’s so sad. It seems managing old age is something that women can do – perhaps being a bit more resourceful or open minded because they haven’t been as defined by their paid work as men are. And that’s something for which “feminism” cannot be blamed. Women seem to have a practical approach to life which helps them in many respects. So from adolescence to old age, men dig holes for themselves. I don’t really know why, (except that its not the fault of women, its something about men themselves). Anyway…its one of those perpetual questions I’ll be thinking about….
It’s been quite a week for the backlash hasn’t it? Just look where those horrid feminists have landed us. On Monday sexual therapist Mary O’Connor told The Last Word that young men are being forced to take Viagra because of the avaricious demands of sex-mad young women. Next it was revealed that women have robbed all the good jobs in medicine, and then refuse to work full-time thus leaving the old and the sick without proper medical care. For good measure, the Irish Times reminded its readers on Tuesday that since women dominate primary school teaching, young boys have no male role models. And just in case you were in any doubt that it’s all gone horribly wrong, on Wednesday Sharon Collins was convicted for conspiring to kill her husband. No wonder men are feeling a bit threatened.
Talk about the Law of Unintended Consequences. This whole feminist business has gotten totally out of hand. Salem witch trials anyone? The polite term bandied about this week was “rebalancing”. Where shall we start with the “rebalancing” lads? What would you like back? The vote? Juries? Equal pay?
How about the pill? That caused a lot of trouble. Once women could choose when to get pregnant they started stealing men’s jobs. Want to bring back the marriage bar? Oh it’s all terribly difficult isn’t it? How will men get back what’s rightfully theirs without sounding…well, sexist.
Let me help. Let’s start with those poor boys whose nerves are interfering with their hydraulics on a Saturday night. I’m sympathetic of course. I know what it is to be objectified, to be rated on your willingness to put out, or up, in your case. Here’s a tip: try not pouring gallons of drink down your throat and a gram of coke up your nose and you never know, there’s an outside chance you might be able to perform to expectations.
As for the teachers. Well, that’s a bit tricky. 85% of primary school teachers are women. No one is stopping men from entering the profession and in fact, they have a much better chance of promotion when they do : 47% of principals are men. But given these good prospects, why won’t they apply to training college?
Here’s my theory. Teaching has lost status and so men have lost interest. Once upon a time, the garda, the schoolmaster, the priest and the doctor were the big buckos around town. Not anymore. Educational culture has changed profoundly over the past 25 years. In poor times, teachers were powerful. They had secure jobs when many had none. They could hit their pupils and dominate weak parents. The balance has shifted, probably too much.
They are powerless and can hardly expel a pupil even if they burn down the school. The pay is average even if the security and the pension are attractive. But it’s not all about the pay because the salaries of primary teachers and gardai are largely similar. There’s no shortage of men applying to the Gardai, so why snub teaching?
Without power, teaching is seen as a job for nice girls who want to work with children. The ones who are smart enough for the Honours Irish but too conservative to try Marketing. It’s for girls who at 17 plan ahead and recognise that a safe job, with short hours and long holidays is a good job for a mother. Teenage boys don’t plan careers that might allow them to be fathers. They want status and teaching doesn’t provide that.
How can the state persuade boys that teaching is a job good enough for a man? They can’t, because some jobs, like cleaning, nursing and minding small children are for women and men know that. Does anyone seriously want to talk about dropping honours Irish to make it easier for boys to apply? If so they should know that women dominate teaching in precisely the same numbers in Australia where there is no onerous language obstacle. It’s not an Irish problem : but one of developed countries. There is no cure, unless you want to re-introduce the marriage bar, so let’s just move on, shall we?
Now, this business of the part-time female doctors. Between 1997 and 2003 70% of graduates from general practice training schools were women. Once these female doctors start their families they cut back on their hours. Yet again we see women plan ahead and forego career opportunities in favour of family life. The result is that there is a shortage of GPs. How do we fix the problem? Well that depends on your agenda.
If you simply want to supply more doctors, try training more. The caps on entries to medical schools are entirely artificial. The numbers have been increased in recent years. Increase it again, and you’ll have enough doctors. Of course, that only solves the problem if you want enough doctors. If your agenda is to get more male doctors, then it’s a bit more complicated.
Girls outperform boys at the Leaving Cert and so get the points for all those prestigious courses like medicine and law. In fact other than in science and engineering, female graduates outnumber male graduates in every discipline. Of course, there’s no need to panic as within fifteen years the shakedown will have happened. Women pull back leaving the path open for men to have the top jobs. Female lawyers, male judges. Female GPs, male consultants. Female teachers, male principals.
I’m not complaining. Women have great choices these days and as Charlotte famously said in Sex and the City when her friends were disgusted that she gave up her job when she got married, “I choose my choice! I choose my choice!”
But men are complaining because though they climb to the top, they have trouble getting on the ladder.
Usually, class dominates educational opportunities, but this is a gender issue. The speculation is that it’s a question of maturity : girls having a superior work ethic at an earlier age. But from where did this work ethic emerge? Is it simply a question of hormones or did someone drum it into their heads that only hard work and a good qualification would open doors for them? Why are teenage boys under the illusion that they can get by without hard work?
Let’s remember one thing : the standards of entry to professions were never lowered to allow women in. Women are where they are because they did the work and made the grade. To lower them for men is not on.
The other important point is that these statistics ignore the fact that while women chase safe professions like lemmings, men gravitate towards the higher risks and greater rewards of business. Once boys grow up they are well able to outstrip women : check out every board room in Ireland for proof of that. All they need to do is grow up a bit quicker. That’s got less to do with hormones and more to do with facing reality.
Boys don’t need a leg up; they need a dressing down. To get ahead, they have knuckle down. No excuses, no witch trials and no backlash.
Peter Bradshaw’s review is a hoot. I was, (and for shame, yes still am) considering going to to see it.
A quick note. He was a nice man, which isn’t necessarily a default comment for politicians. I never saw a trace of spite or aggression or superiority in him. I met him twice, once as a “civilian” over ten years ago and once on Q&A. On each occasion he was kind, self-deprecating and extremely civil – in a non-patronising way – to his political opponents. I thought he made on great breakthrough politically – and that was sorting out the lone-parent’s allowance and recognising that it was a payment which forced families apart.
Very sad to think he is dead at only 60.
Much panic about the reluctance of female GP’s to work full time which is a big problem since 70% of graduating GPs are now women.
The IT adds another problem in its editorial today:
“But if so few female GPs are willing to engage in full-time general practice, then the quality of primary healthcare for patients could suffer. Can doctors who operate on a part-time basis provide an acceptable service to patients, particularly those who suffer from chronic illness and want continuity of care from the same doctor, rather than from a variety of part-time GPs?
In medicine, if the old gender imbalance has been reversed, a new one has been created with, potentially, some adverse consequences for patient healthcare. Another rebalancing may well be needed.
In teaching, an old imbalance of the sexes has been further compounded. At primary level, the ratio of female to male teachers in the 1960s was 2:1, but it has widened greatly since then. Today, four times as many women as men teach in primary schools. The decline of male teachers has deprived boys of a much needed adult role model. The training of teachers and doctors is financed largely by taxpayers to help meet national needs. Perhaps it is time for a review of how well these needs are being met by the present arrangements.”
You know, I hate all these stories about how feminism has really caused so much trouble. How many times do men complain that they would take more paternity leave if only it were paid, and they want to spend more time with their families, but can’t due to work commitments? Women do cut back on their hours at work for the sake of their families – all the time – as the GP study shows. Men could do the same thing too but don’t. Now what? All the reports of the study are gently dancing around and NOT saying what they clearly mean “aagh, stop women becoming doctors! make more men do it! make men become teachers! control control control”.
Don’t try to control the gender of who becomes a doctor – just produce more doctors. Then there’ll be enough to go around. The only reason the points are so high for medicine is that the numbers are so strictly controlled. Open up the system a bit and that will solve the problem.
We have an “on-call” system in Meath and Kildare ( I presume its elsewhere too) where the GPs form a co-operative and take turns being on-call. I’ve used it at weekends and three quarters of the time its a female GP (which roughly fits their representation in the field). It would be nice to see the same doctor each time, but I don’t think male doctors would sign up to that any more than women would. The days of the 24hour 7 day on-call local GP are long gone – and that’s nothing to do with women – just different expectations that GPs have of their own lifestyles. Our local practice is 50-50 male-female and they work the same hours.
And if men don’t want to be primary schools teachers there isn’t a whole lot you can do about it. You can try and advertise and encourage, but if they think the job is beneath them, then what?
There were no gender quotas (and rightly so) to get women into medicine and teaching. Don’t even think about quotas to keep them out.
Also in the “feminism gone mad” theme, ONE psychologist, Mary O’Connor claims that young men (19-22) are being FORCED!!! to carry Viagra so they can “perform” to the expectations of “demanding” young women who want casual sex after a night on the town. Apparently their confidence is shot. Gee, now WHERE would women get the idea that casual and wild sexual encounters are a good idea?? Would women not know anything about poor sexual self- confidence caused by high expectations and pressure to put out? And does the Viagra have less to do with the supposed demands of these outrageous women and more to do with the effects of alcohol and cocaine? Give me a break.
Enda Kenny tells a story describing his annual summer holiday in Co. Kerry. Each year he looks forward to getting the bike out and making an attempt at the Conor Pass. In the summer of 2006, he’d been struggling mightily up the steep incline, puffing and gasping, conscious that his tortuous progress was being observed by a native who was leaning against a wall, chewing a piece of straw. As the Leader of the Opposition struggled past, our friend against the wall enquired “Are you enjoying yourself, are ya?
Kenny replied that despite all appearances he was enjoying himself no end. Forming a credible opposition to the behemoth that is Fianna Fail was a similar experience. It was hard work, didn’t look pretty, but he thoroughly enjoyed the challenge.
In the past couple of months it looks like Kenny has stopped enjoying the fight. He seemed to take the loss of the general election alright. After all, Fine Gael had done their bit by winning 20 seats. These days he looks tired, worn and the constant criticisms of his media performances are hurting.
So what’s gone wrong and can it be put right? I’d start by asking another question. Where is Enda Kenny? I met him a couple of times when he was a Minister in the Fine Gael led coalition government. He was a hoot. He’s a naturally vivacious man; a great raconteur who can sing a ballad, sink a pint and speak Irish just as well if not better than the current Taoiseach whose talents in these fields are so widely advertised. He has that common touch and connection with people for which the most recent ex-Taoiseach was much admired. Despite the fact that Fine Gael were written off by the commentariat before the election, he did a great job in winning as many seats as he did. He’s clearly got a lot going for him, and yet he’s missing something else too.
The something that’s missing is his personality. It took a hit when he was elected leader of the party and it disappears the second a TV camera is put on him. He’s trying too hard to be a good leader and in the process forgetting to be himself. The result is that we can’t see his natural personality: the one that got him elected in Mayo and to the leadership of his party. His speeches and comments appear contrived. He’s trying so hard he occasionally takes on the look of someone pretending to be a leader instead of someone who is.
I suspect he’s been trained. I’ve worked in Public Relations and have witnessed the havoc that media training can wreak on an otherwise perfectly personable individual. They’ve had all their foibles and errors picked over to the extent they turn into quivering wrecks. The trainee, previously a high functioning politician or executive pays big money to be told that the charismatic qualities that enabled their rise to the top are now a liability that must be stamped out at all costs. It’s a disaster. Kenny bears all the hallmarks of the over-advised. He has no self-confidence and if he has no confidence in himself, then it’s hard for the casual viewer to have confidence in him either.
So what’s to be done? Well, the first thing is that anyone who talks about dumping him should seek urgent admission into a centre for political reality checks. There’s no one on the front bench remotely capable of doing the job any better. Richard Bruton is far too genteel, James O’Reilly too raw, Simon Coveney still has growing up to do and Brian Hayes needs ministerial experience.
Furthermore, Fine Gaelers have always made the huge mistake of getting rid of leaders the minute the polls take a dive. Fianna Fail leaders have to be practically taken away in handcuffs before anyone dares to utter a word against them. Party members refuse to break ranks and people admire that. Changing leaders every few years, as Fine Gael does, shows that they are unsure, disloyal and panicky. Who’d vote for a party like that?
Kenny must stay and sort himself out. The good news is that this is a simple enough job. First he needs to take a long holiday and get a good rest. He’s no use to anyone tired and right now, he looks worn out. Doing the Conor Pass a couple of times might give him a fresh perspective. When he gets back his handlers need to slow down his schedule and keep him perky.
Then he needs to start enjoying himself again and look on the bright side. After all, it could be worse. He could be Taoiseach. In the current economic and post-Lisbon mess, he can cheerfully tell himself, “Not my problem!” Kenny doesn’t have to take the flak and oh joy, Brian Cowen does.
It wasn’t always this easy. Bertie Ahern’s easy going nature was a disaster for the opposition who found it almost impossible to rattle him. Despite predictions that the arrogant and aggressive Brian Cowen would “wipe the floor” with Kenny in the Dail, this has not proved to be the case. Cowen is easily riled. That makes him vulnerable as the F*ckers incident has already demonstrated. Dail sketch writers like Miriam Lord have conceded that in recent weeks Kenny has gained the upper hand. Cowen talked the talk during Leaders Questions on the estimates during the week, but he looked pale and uncomfortable. The shell-shocked appearance of Brian Lenihan is little help.
Kenny’s anger at the hole in the national finances was genuine and deadly. The only pity for him is that the Dail is due to rise soon and he’ll be reliant on TV appearances again to keep him in the public eye.
This is his weak spot, but there is hope there too. I know he can forget the cameras and be himself because I saw him do it once.
During the general election campaign, RTE’s Brian Dowling did some informal one-on-one interviews with the party leaders.
Kenny was interviewed in a relaxed atmosphere: some hotel where he was sitting on a couch in his shirt sleeves. For 3 or 4 glorious minutes he forgot there was a camera in the same room. He chatted seriously but lightly to Dowling explaining his political priorities. It was unscripted, sincere, and the most genuine and believable performance of the whole campaign. Or rather, it wasn’t a performance at all. It was the Enda Kenny I had met many years ago and hadn’t seen since. The Kenny that is sharp, analytical and sincere in his desire for common sense governance and social justice.
Alas, it was a fleeting moment and most voters never got to see that side of him. His other television appearances were formal set-ups where he’d been primed and coached into a mannequin.
But at least we know that he is capable of letting go of the burden of his position in front of a camera. He just needs to do it more often. He might say the wrong thing the odd time, but trying to say the right thing isn’t working for him. People don’t believe it and so they can’t quite believe in him. If he can have confidence in his own instincts and his own heart, that could change. Let the real Enda Kenny stand up. If people don’t like him, fair enough. But at least let them reject the man he is and not the man he’s trying to be. At this stage he has nothing to lose, so why not?
Note: Now lads, BEFORE Crewser, B and everybody else take off I’d like to show you this, which Pete sent me last year and I love. Let’s keep some perspective!
This link will probably time out but for the next few hours..wasn’t this a beautiful photograph that the IT picked? I only saw the last few games of the match and was disgusted that I hadn’t tuned in earlier. What a joy to watch. I had given up on Wimbledon completely, contenting myself with nostalgia for the McEnroe/Borg/Connors years. But this was such a pleasure. There is still beauty and heroism in the world…
The Uncle rang during the week. A long lost cousin had turned up in a play at The Gate. Three generations of Genevieve O’Reilly’s family emigrated to Australia in the 1970′s. She was 8 when she went. Lo and behold she finds herself as a successful actor back in Dublin in Conor McPherson’s The Weir.
A party was quickly organised and 6 of us high tailed it to The Gate last night. After the show we lay in wait and accosted the poor woman, announcing ourselves as her relations. My mother and the uncle would be first cousins of her deceased grandfather. We agreed afterwards she couldn’t have been more gracious and charming. When she had the alternative to be alarmed and wary 
Apparently we weren’t the first. Her colleagues have been much entertained by the line of Cavan based fans eager to introduce themselves. We think she should be getting a cut of the takings as her presence is attracting extra crowds.
We had a great chat and the various connections were examined and the status of cousins (alive, dead, nursing home) were confirmed and the family resemblances much remarked upon. The Uncle left the fair Genevieve under no illusions that her talents were clearly from our branch of the family. Were not Brady’s well known to come from a long line of intellectuals and poets to the Chieftains? (Though he acknowledged that people who mightn’t like the clan pointed out that the Irish for Brady – Bradaich? – could be translated as “thief”.) Anyway, the importance of dramatic societies in the life of rural Ireland was also stressed and the Uncle revealed that his performance as the Bishop in The Field was so convincing that the audience blessed themselves at its completion. He recited the speech for our benefit.
Then pictures were taken as proof of the event and her contact details extracted so she can be interviewed on Northern Sound.
As for the play itself, it was a triumph. I can honestly say I haven’t enjoyed anything as much for years. Too often the theatre experience is worthy, or interesting, or harrowing or if its too bloody long, tiring. This was a pleasure and a joy to watch. So a rare treat.
Everything was brilliant. The set, the production, the cast were so strong. When it first began I thought uh-oh here we go, “stage-Irish”, over-acting, play it for laughs, usual Irish shite. Then as we settled in we were overtaken by the pleasure of recognising the characters from people we know at home, the modes of speech (cursing one minute and completely understated the next) and of course the whole tragedy behind the bonhomie. Sean McGinley really is in a class of his own but Denis Conway, David Ganly and Mark Lambert were excellent too. And of course, Genevieve, who had a tough role to play, was really really good. It was so nice to see understatement on an Irish stage. The others were all “characters” with funny lines but she had the “straight” role and she pulled it off beautifully and drew us in when it looked like she was just sitting around. Also hats off to Conor McPherson. He really GOT rural Ireland. And I noticed from the programme he’s the same age as me! But The Weir has been around about 10 years I think?
Anyway, it was a full house and yet again Michael Colgan has shown up The Abbey. A commercially successful production of an Irish play. Why does The Abbey struggle so much?
It’s on til August. Definitely go. Although, if you are a Dub I wonder if you’d get the same kick out of it that we did?
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