01.08.06

Motorway that has driven me to madness

Posted in Feminism at 1:39 pm by Sarah

I got a glimpse into the mind of a vandal last week and it wasn’t pretty. I felt the overwhelming sense of alienation, the bitter resentment, the urge to exact revenge and the willingness to inflict damage. It gives me no pleasure to report that the mind was my own.ÂÂ

The object of my disaffection was the new M4 motorway between Kilcock and Kinnegad. My feelings of violence were aimed specifically at the road and not any individuals.

I live near Enfield, the site of the main interchange on the new motorway. We residents tried to be reasonable during its furiously paced construction.ÂÂ

Oh, all right, so there were days when our benign toleration escalated into hysteria. There was that shrieking phone call to the project engineer when our cul-de-sac was closed without permit or notice. And an abusive e-mail when the footpaths to the village remained in rubble for months as all resources were directed at the motorway itself. But I never considered direct action until the day the double buggy overturned.ÂÂ

I’d been trying to negotiate the 24 potholes not far from my front gate. They are on that stretch of laneway that crosses a small stream, which was often the centre of our childhood adventures. The stream now serves as drainage for the motorway. To prepare it for its new purpose, the lovely Land Commission walls that had stood for nearly 70 years were smashed. The road surface collapsed under the weight of the machines, leaving potholes in their wake.ÂÂ

Even as they matured into craters we assumed that one day the motorway people would come back and fill them in. I tried not to let the damage get to me, because this is the countryside and there will always be potholes. Then they grew so large that the buggy couldn’t fit between them any more and my agitation increased.ÂÂ

One front and one back wheel would sink in separate holes. I am small and the buggy is heavy. Usually, I could bear down and with a good shove and the occasional grunt rescue the journey. But on the day in question the hole was too deep and my arms too weak.ÂÂ

So there we were: two children screaming as they and the pram lay sideways on the road and me, desperately, trying to lift the whole lot. With nobody around to help it was a case of inward panic, outward calmness and holding back the tears of frustration.ÂÂ

As I took a deep breath and searched for the physical strength to rescue my party, I heard the cars whizzing by at €2.40 a time. The motorists, I thought, are being well looked after. I, on the other hand, was a nothing, a mother with a double buggy, a bottom feeder in the greater scheme of things. One of the non-people ignored by men in suits who build big roads and sell big cars to each other.ÂÂ

Now that the blasted road has been opened, Eurolink, the operator, can sit back and collect its money, even though the fallout from the project remains unresolved. There is no imperative to fill potholes or repair gates. The company is getting its revenue; what does it care? That was when the red mist descended and I thought: “God, I would love to mess up their road.” That was when I found myself thinking thoughts similar to those who get their kicks from keying cars, smashing windows and daubing public places with graffiti. If you are surrounded by it, can’t afford it, and nobody wants you to have it anyway, stealing it or breaking it starts to look reasonable.ÂÂ

As I engaged in my destructive fantasies, I imagined myself breaking one of the unmanned toll booth barriers, thereby depriving the owners of revenue. Walking alongside the highway, I furtively examined the toll plaza for security cameras. Then I realised I was on the road to insanity and walked away.ÂÂ

As I did so, I came across another reason for getting mad — the 6ft concrete fencing posts left on the overpass beside my home. These are perfect ammunition for those lunatics who have recently taken to dropping lumps of concrete onto the traffic below.ÂÂ

The presence of this material jarred with statements made by Eurolink. Last week the company said it was “horrified” that people had been throwing concrete at cars and hoped those responsible would be caught “before someone is hurt”. It also claimed that all construction material had been removed from the overpasses.ÂÂ

There are at least 100 posts on that bridge as I write, any one of which could be used as a weapon. Perhaps before somebody is actually hurt, the company might remove the materials that are proving so convenient for the person, drugged or deranged, who is engaging in this practice.ÂÂ

I know that the new road is a fine piece of infrastructure. It will reduce the torture for those driving west on bank holiday Fridays and home again on Mondays. It will probably reduce road deaths, since Leinster Bridge, on the old N4 near Enfield, usually claimed a few lives each year.ÂÂ

But could somebody remind the shiny-faced managing director of Eurolink who appeared on television last week that the work is not complete. Is it too much to ask that the same frenetic pace of activity that saw the motorway open ahead of schedule now be applied to repair the damage left in its wake? You see, despite my capacity for hysteria, I can actually restrain myself. But not for ever.ÂÂ

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